Monday, February 15, 2010

And Now For Something Completely The Same:

So what else well the other day I said I've been writing and I have. Quite a bit really but it is not what i would call substantial. well not in that there is a plot. There is no real plot, however there is probably themes running through all these that can be debated but since I don't even know anyone gives a shit, or reads it, well it doesn't matter does it? Really though, for a while now I just have been carrying either a pen and paper around with me everywhere I go, or barring that my iPhone, it has a wonderful note feature that works wonders. I'll just put up a couple small things now, and the longer things will go up after I get back from EWC this weekend. I have no idea if any of it is decent, it probably sucks or could at least become less horrible if polished up and as I see stuff I change it but for the most part it is put down here as it was written however many months ago. I think I will start noting the date when I add something since the note feature just updates to the date you added it, not when something specific occurs.
*Note the dashed lines means the end of something*

Behavior gives an impression
here in the spotlight
I say its not attention
Self-esteem again
where do I belong?
self doubt again
what I don't have
I'm fearing the most
This fragile thing
I have hope
I may never find it
why take the risk?
When everyone says run.
Self esteem, self doubt
Cannot be the same
I feel secure enough
And now I try not to care
Whats in my mind
Frothing in it's confusion
This river of jumbled thoughts
Meanders through my brain
The course it carves is ever changing.
What will it leave behind
Do I want it exposed
I don't know what to do
Tedium and boredom punctuate my days
Their voices cutting through the fog.

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